7 Steps to a drama-free office

By Kaley Klemp and Jim Warner

If you work with other people reflect on the last week and notice how much time you wasted in drama: the energy-draining behaviors or exchanges that keep you from what you really want to be doing.

Think about all the infighting, water-cooler talk, meaningless meetings, turf wars, pouting, rants and other behaviors that blocked positive, productive interactions in your organization.

Now, think about how many creative projects you could have completed, or how much time you could have spent having fun with friends and family if you had that time and energy back.

By following these seven steps, you can shift yourself (and your team) away from drama to more enjoyable and productive tasks.

Step 1: Get Out of Your Own Drama

One of the most difficult challenges for aspiring leaders is to “own their stuff” – to acknowledge their own responsibility for relationship shortcomings. So, before you can guide others, you must take inventory of both your interaction strengths (i.e., where you uplift relationships) and the ways you sabotage relationships.

The strength inventory is usually easy. The sabotage inventory is more difficult. It requires the vulnerability and courage to seek others’ candid observations and advice about your behavior. To find out your own drama tendencies, you can use self-reflection, ask your colleagues, or take a drama assessment (www.dramafreeoffice.com/self-assessment-survey/).

You can only help others when you are curious yourself. Take a deep breath, get re-centered and get out of your own way.

Step 2: Diagnose the Type of Drama in the Other Person

Once you are committed to authenticity and curiosity yourself, you can determine what kind of drama the other person is displaying. There are four primary drama roles that emerge most frequently in office settings: the Complainer, the Controller, the Cynic and the Caretaker.

You’ll need to use different strategies for different personality types – there is no “one size fits all” antidote for drama. Notice the kind of person you’re dealing with. Will they respond more to direct confrontation and setting boundaries (better for Controllers and Cynics), or to appreciation and encouragement (better for Caretakers and Complainers)? Know who you’re dealing with and tailor your approach to maximize your chance for shifting their behavior.

Step 3: Assess the Risk of Confronting the Other Person

Before meeting with drama-prone colleagues, you must identify and evaluate the potential downsides of a confrontation. Without objectively assessing these risks, you might be tempted to either accept a dysfunctional relationship you could have salvaged or make a misstep you could have avoided.

Before launching into a direct conversation with your boss or a team member, consider the possible side effects (e.g., nothing happens, it gets worse, they abruptly leave) and whether you’re willing to face them.

Step 4: Develop Rapport with the Drama-Prone Person

It’s important to establish rapport with the other person so he is best prepared to receive your message. Try opening with a blend of connection, appreciation, ground rules and expectations. Your goal is to get the person’s full attention and to set him up to be receptive to your ideas. People prefer to collaborate with those they know and like, so this step is powerful in setting the tone for the rest of the conversation.

Step 5: Have a Direct Conversation

While an entire article could be written about direct conversations, when confronting a person about their drama, stay dispassionate and state “the facts” clearly and concisely. Also present the meaning you derived from the facts (i.e., your perceptions), and any emotions you experience – usually some combination of fear, anger, guilt or embarrassment.
This next part is a little tougher. Share with the person how you contributed to the situation (why it’s your fault, too). Then, end with a specific request. Usually these conversations end with an agreement about what will happen next to make sure the drama ends.

While this may sound simple, each component outlined above is worth practicing and mastering so that the entire conversation flows smoothly. For instance, it’s very easy to mix facts and derived meaning.

People often say, “The facts are, you are being difficult.” When, in fact, the level of cooperation or difficulty of an individual is derived meaning or perception. One person may consider challenging an idea as difficult behavior and another might appreciate it as a commitment to improvement.

Step 6: Get Their Commitment

The last step of the direct conversation in Step 5 is your specific requests or expectations of the person. A commitment to realize these expectations without excuses, sarcasm, self-pity or martyrdom is often difficult to obtain from drama-prone people. They’ll dance around the expectation or rephrase them in vague terms.

These deflection or evasion tactics are a self-protection mechanism that helps the dramatic person avoid both change and accountability. Don’t get hooked. Reiterate both your specific expectations and your need for the drama-prone person’s commitment to meet them. If she continues to resist or deflect, be prepared to calmly lay out an ultimatum, including specific rewards for meeting objectives and consequences for missing objectives.

Step 7: Validate and Anchor Their Commitment and New Behavior

Praise the person for his positive behaviors during your meeting, and honor the commitments he made. Follow up with a short note or email confirming and affirming the person’s commitments.

Ideally, ask them to create a summary of your meeting that includes their specific agreements. People live up to what they write down.

Once you’ve done these seven steps, you have done the hard work. Now you can redirect your energy toward the collaborative, meaningful projects that you enjoy doing, and work in an office free from drama.

Kaley Klemp and Jim Warner are the authors of The Drama-Free Office: A Guide to Healthy Collaboration with Your Team, Coworkers, and Boss.

The Amish and Indiana’s economy

By Rebecca R. Bibbs

From the time he was 14 - when he left school as most Amish children do - Kenny Stutzman of Middlebury fed his entrepreneurial spirit, first as an auctioneer, then as owner of a motor coach company he started in 1985 and later sold.
“It got too big, too fast,” the 68-year-old said.

But in 1999, at a time when many consider winding down their careers, Stutzman started Buggy Lane Tours, in which he takes “English” or non-Amish visitors on tours of the area in one of eight authentic horse-drawn Amish buggies.

Probably the largest, most visible contribution the Amish make to the state’s economy comes in the form of tourism. Though he wasn’t able to provide a precise breakdown, Indiana Office of Tourism Development spokesman Brian Blackford agreed that the Amish, especially in northern Indiana, draw a great number of the 52 million tourists who generate $10 billion for the state.
So what exactly are the Amish selling?

The simple life. The idea that good things come from hard work and that handcrafted items are more valuable than machine-tooled goods.

Since the first four Amish families arrived from Pennsylvania and settled on land just east of Goshen in 1841, pockets of Amish have settled around the state from Daviess, Orange and Washington counties in the south to Parke County in East Central Indiana and Rush County in West Central Indiana. But the largest concentration of Amish are in Northern Indiana, clustered in and around Bristol, Elkhart, Goshen, Middlebury, Nappanee, Shipshewana, and Wakarusa.

For instance, in the general farming population, only a small percentage of the Amish are able to support their large families as full-time farmers. Though most still live on family farms where they keep livestock and grow produce for their own use, many are forced to start side businesses or take jobs in factories, artisan workshops and cottage businesses to make ends meet.
Stutzman, for instance, sold his dairy farm to his two sons.

“It’s a very good life to raise a family, but it’s very difficult to make a living at it in these times,” he said. “I gave my sons a very good deal so they could farm.”

Until the recent recession, the Amish made up much of the workforce in the recreational vehicle industry centered in Elkhart. The men are renowned for their carpentry, often working in the production of furniture and cabinetry produced from Indiana oak or poplar.

The women often can be found working in restaurants and retail businesses. Some operate cottage industries producing handmade quilts or food items like jams and jellies.

The Amish also contribute to the state’s economy as consumers. Though they don’t own cars and shun electricity in their homes, the Amish don’t turn away from all modern advances. They often are seen, for instance, at Indiana University Medical Center in Indianapolis, where a premature baby may be receiving life-saving care at Riley Hospital for Children at Indiana University Health or at Indiana University  Hospital where a wife is treated for breast cancer.

The Amish also contribute to the state’s coffers by paying taxes. And just as they attract curiosity from tourists, the Amish also attract other business owners wanting to cash in.

Mennonites Naomi and Steve Graber turned their relatively newly built home in the southern Indiana town of Odon into a bed and breakfast five years ago after their three children and moved out.

“There’s no accommodations for people to stay around here, except for Washington, which is 20 miles away,” Naomi Graber said.

However, the Amish experience in southern Indiana probably is more authentic than that of northern Indiana because of less exposure to outsiders, she said. There are fewer Amish in southern Indiana who have opened up their farms or cook for visitors.
“They’re probably 10 years ahead of us up there,” Graber said. “We would love to be more busy.”

But Stutzman and Graber admit all the attention can come at a price, causing tension between the rules of their religion and their exposure to 21st century living. For instance, the longtime rules have been that people should not be photographed, though inanimate manmade objects like corn cribs or buildings could be.

“As a little boy being Amish,” Stutzman said, “picture-taking was a no-no.” Though most won’t run away any more if someone tries to photograph them, the Amish still won’t pose.

So how do they feel about being ogled?

“They’re fine with it because they benefit from it through the tourism in the area,” Stutzman said.

Though the Amish traditionally have tried to live separately to reduce the temptations of modern life, their inability to be totally self-sustaining has required some modern conveniences, including the purchases of cell phones and development of Web sites.
“The more tourism you get, the more you have to cater to what people want,” Graber admitted.

The balancing act Making time work for you

You planned to get to work early to finish the project that’s due today, but now the car will not start. You know you wrote the mechanic’s name down somewhere, but now you cannot remember where you put it. You frantically search through your notes, but you cannot find it anywhere. There is no way you are going to have time to finish your project. You start to panic.
The clock just keeps ticking.

Most of us have felt swamped at one time or another. With hectic work schedules, family responsibilities, and social engagements, there just does not seem to be enough time for everything we need and want to do. However, there is light at the end of the tunnel. Although life will always provide us with its little twists and turns, once we learn to manage our time wisely, much of the day-to-day chaos in our lives can be reduced or even eliminated.

The first step in learning how to manage your time is to develop a general work schedule. Your work schedule should include time for yourself as well as time for the maintenance of your business.

After you’ve defined the major elements of your workload, the next step is to prioritize them by identifying critical deadlines, routine maintenance items, and fun/relaxation time. Answering questions like “How much time do I have to make this decision, finish this task, or contact this person?” will help you to start identifying what needs to be done immediately versus what can wait. Setting priorities depends on deadlines, how many people you must call to get the information you need, and whether you can delegate or get assistance from others. If you are involved in group projects, reserve additional time for communication and problem-solving.

Once you have identified your priorities, look at all of your options for achieving them. Evaluate and move forward with the ones you feel are the most useful for you. The only time to consider changing approaches mid-task is when you know the change will save time. If you are in doubt, it is usually best to factor in the direction you started.

By setting up your work schedule and identifying your priorities, you have already started down the road to more effective time management. Other time management suggestions you may find useful for managing both your business life as well as your personal life include the following:

Contract out tasks. Contract out tasks you do not have the expertise to complete. Your client will appreciate your honesty and effort to get the best result.

Start with the most worrisome task. Start the morning, afternoon, or evening with the most worrisome task before you. This will reduce your anxiety level for the next task.

Complete deadline work early. Not only will this reduce stress and lighten your work schedule, but it will also give you more self-confidence about managing your schedule.

Know your capacity for stress. When you are hitting overload, take the break you need (even if it is a short one) when you need it.
Stay organized. Take time at the end of each day to briefly organize your desk and make reminder lists of tasks for the next day or week.

Take advantage of down time. Allow yourself some down time between busy periods to review your schedule and reevaluate your priorities.

Get physical. Physical exertion such as walking, bicycling, swimming, or organized sports activities helps to discharge stress. Stretching, yoga, jumping rope, sit-ups, playing with children, or doing yard work are other types of therapeutic breaks you should consider during times of stress.

Have fun. Be sure to have some fun while working or playing; a good sense of humor can keep most problems in perspective.
Divide your time. Decide how much time to spend on business development, personal needs, volunteerism, and family. Start by allowing 25 percent of your time for yourself. Each time you make a commitment, set a timeline for your involvement. Remember that maintenance takes at least 25 percent of the time you spend on any project whether it’s business, marriage, or serving on the board of a non-profit organization.

Build flexibility into your schedule. Your availability to family and friends depends on the flexibility you build into your schedule. Female business owners frequently have the primary responsibility for making sure family members are cared for when they are dependent or ill, so it’s necessary to leave some time in your schedule for emergencies or to have good backup resources. Get to know your neighbors so you know who to call on for help in times of crisis.

In the bigger picture, consider the relationship between your business life and your personal life. Be as realistic as possible when answering the following questions, keeping in mind what is most important to you:

Don’t underestimate the toll that emotional stress takes on your physical health and your ability to concentrate on your work or enjoy time with your family. Make sure you have time for the important people and events in your life.

Information courtesy of the Small Business Administration.

3 barriers to Black farm ownership

(1) Expense:
Even if they can afford the $8,000 an acre to buy land or were lucky enough to inherit some, farmers need upwards of 1,000 acres to earn a reasonable living. Having that much land requires equipment, and that adds to the cost. “You almost have to be a farming family to make it in this day and age,” said Gletus Hardiman, who farmed with his father and four brothers.

(2) History:
African-Americans have a love-hate relationship with agriculture because of its deep association with slavery. Gary R. Grant, president of the Black Farmers and Agriculturalists Association, said because of inheritances, there are more Black owners of southern farmland in Chicago than in Mississippi, but they sell it away to white buyers. “We are always running away from what is us,” he said.

(3) Factory jobs:
The Great Migration of the early 20th century brought many African-Americans to the North, but rather than buying land and farming there, they headed for the steel mills and auto production plants. The lure? A better guarantee of pay, compared to the risks of weather-related or disease-induced crop failure.

Migrant agriculture workers face a variety of employment challenges
By Rebecca R. Bibbs

They’re seen from May 1 to June 30 cutting the long stalks of asparagus in northeast Indiana. They pluck the pears from the trees of southern Indiana from Aug. 15 to Oct. 1. And they hunch over pumpkin patches in Central Indiana from Sept. 1 to Oct. 30 so Hoosiers can have jack-o-lanterns and Thanksgiving pies.

The estimated 12,000 migrant workers, who descend on Indiana, are an essential part of the state’s agricultural economy. They come to the Hoosier state to work in the fields, in canning and packing, and in other processing functions for small local farms to large multinational companies like Monsanto.

Among the complaints made by migrant farm workers, most of whom are Hispanics/Latinos in the U.S. on six-month work visas, is that recruiters make many promises the employers refuse to keep in regard to amount of available work, food, transportation and pay. And when they try to assert their rights under the Fair Labor Relations Act of 1938 and the Agricultural Labor Relations Act, they say, employers often retaliate.

Melody Goldberg, director of Indiana Legal Services’ Migrant Farm Workers Center, said pay, by far, is the greatest area of discontent. Recruiters make a variety of promises, whether it’s minimum wage, more than minimum wage or per acre.

“It’s not only in terms of minimum wage that there are problems. We get into trouble at all levels of the pay scale,” she said.
Housing issues also make up a great number of complaints, Goldberg said. It’s not unusual for employers to try to squeeze five adult men to sleep in one room with only two beds.

“We have a smattering of tax cases for some whose identities were stolen,” Goldberg added. Sometimes Social Security numbers are stolen and used.

Employers often are emboldened to skirt the rules, knowing the migrant workers are totally dependent on them, Goldberg said. If they are fired, most have no way to get back to Florida or the Southwest. And most areas don’t have social services workers knowledgeable of the Spanish language or Hispanic/Latino culture.

Compared to other states, Indiana also has relatively weak labor laws, especially regarding overtime compensation, Goldberg said. In addition, migrant workers are exempt from the workers’ compensation law. Also, she said, there are few child labor laws at either the state or federal level.

“There’s a lot fewer restrictions for child labor in agriculture,” she said.

Though many migrant farm workers likely feel undervalued, farm owners recognize how essential they are to the economy. Earlier this year, farm owners and associated businesses signed a compact opposing immigration legislation put forth by the Indiana General Assembly that would make it more challenging and time-consuming to hire migrant workers.

A number of organizations have formed the Indiana Migrant and Seasonal Farm Worker Coalition to examine and try to resolve some of the issues.

As important as they are to Indiana’s economy, however, there sometimes are economic consequences of hiring this mobile population, including health care needs for respiratory issues; education pressures for their children, who may not speak English and who remain in schools for only a short while; and many working illegally never pay taxes.

Women farmers increase by 20 percent over past decade

By Rebecca R. Bibbs

It’s a Sunday afternoon in August when Charlotte P. Wolfe decides what to do with the excess milk produced by the cow she milks nearly an hour each day. The owner of Prairie Winds Nature Farm in Lakeville, Ind., turns to a solution used by generations of farm women throughout the world for preserving milk for future use.

“I have been trying my hand at making a cheese out of it,” she said.

Wolfe is one of Indiana’s 23,732 women farmers, according to the most recent Census of Agriculture. She is one of 6,377 women who describe themselves as a farm’s principal operator, though she owns it with her husband Robert.

As the number of farm owners in general is decreasing, the number of women-owned farms has increased about 20 percent over the past decade, the census reports. It’s estimated more than one in 10 U.S. farms is run by a woman.

Many scholars assert women have been central to the running of farms throughout history. In general, they performed the subsistence tasks of growing – and preserving – the family’s vegetable gardens and caring for the chickens, while the men engaged in the industrial farming of livestock and grains that were used by the greater community.

Wolfe fits the profile of modern woman farmers. Most run small farms committed to specialized enterprises like growing organic fruits and vegetables, perennials and herb gardens, organic livestock and retail sales of farm-produced items like soaps and jellies. Their growth is attributed to an increasing consumer interest in farmer’s markets, buying locally and community support of agriculture programs in which people pay a one-time price early in the spring to buy fresh produce throughout the growing season.

In 1992, Wolfe decided to put her Ph.D. to use in environmental science by buying 85 acres of which 60 are for northern Indiana prairie wetland conservation and restoration and 20 are used for small-scale farming and education programs. Her business has allowed Wolfe to be a stay-at-home mom to 13-year-old daughter Robin.

But like many farmers, Wolfe struggles to actually earn money from her enterprise. Organic farms, for instance, do not receive the government subsidies paid to commercial farms. In fact, like African-American farmers, female farmers also earlier this year reached a $1.3 billion settlement for claims up to $50,000 for discriminatory practices by the U.S. Department of Agriculture for the denial of loans between 1981 and 2000.

Wolfe’s earnings also are affected by much smaller yields because she refuses to use pesticides and fossil fuels to operate equipment.

“I think increasingly women get it as far as sustainability and taking care of the earth,” she said.

And though Wolfe can meet all her own nutritional needs from the farm, she admits her husband and daughter aren’t entirely on board.

“They want store-bought milk. They don’t like the taste of the milk from the farm,” she said.

Women in agriculture

Purdue University Extension has a Purdue Women in Agriculture Team created to address the needs of women farmers and farmers’ wives. For instance, the extension offers Annie’s Project at sites throughout the state to help women develop stronger support systems and become better business partners to their farmer husbands.
For more information, visit www.extension.purdue.edu/wia/meet.htm.